It may not surprise you to hear that a new friend can help you live longer. The world’s longest-lived people already understand this. Among the places in the world where people live the longest, socializing with friends is an important part of life.
Socialising has a measurable result on health. In fact, research has shown that people with stronger social relationships have a 50% greater chance of survival than those who don’t. This should come as no surprise, since both ancient wisdom and modern happiness research agree: strong friendships are key — maybe the key — to having a happy life.
So how do you build true friendship?
1. Put it in your calendar.
Friendships are built not just on shared interests, but on time shared together. Scheduling time for friendship just as you would any other routine that is important for health and well-being.
2. Find time for face time.
It’s important to make time for phone calls, as well as in-person chats.
3. Remember big moments.
Celebrating milestones like birthdays and anniversaries with a phone call or card also supports friendships.
4. Build traditions.
Establishing rituals with close friends — an annual trip to the lake cabin or the beach, a monthly movie date perhaps — can also strengthen bonds.
5. Focus on quality, not quantity.
Remember, it’s the quality of friendships that measurably impacts well-being: supportive, encouraging friends help boost health; draining relationships hurt health.
Then there’s the frenemy: the guy who pretend to be your friend but in actual fact s/he is never supporting your interest and can’t seem to stop competing with you.
Studies have shown that these mixed-bag people raise your blood pressure even more than purely negative people.
Given that finding, it might be worth considering whether it’s time to move on from any of these kinds of friends. That way, you’ll have time to focus on deepening those friendships that really benefit your health.
