Hey pals, am delighted to be here with you once again. Last week was wonderful and I was more than delighted to get your responses and answer all your questions. Anyway, I promised we were going to continue this week and here we are. Remember we discussed ‘your personal values and goals’ hence today; we will focus on ‘your feelings’.
I want you to know that when it comes to making decisions about sex, your feelings are much more important than anyone else’s. Reason is, ‘it’s your body’ and you shouldn’t allow someone destroy it for you by pressurizing you or even through ’emotional blackmail’.
You must take your feelings seriously and think properly if this is something you truly want to do or if it’s something your partner (boyfriend/girlfriend) or friends are pushing you into. The truth is, in many relationships, one party wants to have sex while the other does not. Again, one party is more curious and has stronger sexual feelings than the other. Or another person has religious reasons why he or she doesn’t want to have sex and the other person doesn’t share those beliefs. Whatever the situation, don’t compromise what you know is right. As with almost every other major decisions in life, you need to do what is right for you and not anyone else.
If you think sex is a good idea because a boyfriend or girlfriend wants to begin a sexual relationship, think again. Anyone who tries to pressure you into having sex by saying, “if you truly cared, you wouldn’t say no,” or “if you loved me, you’d show it by having sex” isn’t really looking out for you and what matters most to you. They’re looking to satisfy their own feelings and urges about sex.
If you feel that you should have sex because you’re afraid of losing that person, it may be a good time to end the relationship. If a boyfriend or girlfriend truly loves you, he or she won’t push or pressurize you to do something you don’t believe in or aren’t ready for yet.
If you don’t feel right about something, say so! Anyone who challenges your choice on saying ‘NO’ is not giving you the respect that you deserve. Pay attention to your feelings, and don’t let anyone make you feel guilty for making decisions that are right for you.
You have a right to choose abstinence and any partner who doesn’t respect your wishes may not be the best partner for you.
