For a long time, girls have fought — and are still fighting — to overcome gender roles and expectations. However, it’s important to remember that rigid ideas about what men and women “should” or “shouldn’t” do isn’t just bad for women.
A Dec. 17th thread asked the guys of Reddit, “What girly thing do you really want to do or try but it is socially unacceptable?” Responses ranged from cuddling etiquette (“Being the little spoon”) to fashion woes (“Toe socks”) and showing emotion (“Crying in public without getting judged”).
Here are 9 of our favourite answers:
1. Have more stylish clothing options. As bradleynowell252 pointed out, “Girls just get so many choices on nice things to wear and still look good, even in a casual manner.” It’s true that while ladies can wear “masculine” clothing free of judgment, the same cannot be said for men in “feminine” clothing. “Also, fancy hats. It’s a shame that only women get to have awesome adornments in their headwear without any social stigma,” lokiikol noted.
2. Be able to talk about other men being attractive. Kbjami brought up an important point when he wrote: “Talking about how hot Brad Pitt is. I’m not gay but I find Brad Pitt quite attractive. Actually just talking about how attractive males are in general.” We completely agree, guys should definitely be able to compliment other guys.
3. Carry a purse. Emmy_Bee was one of the first to comment: “Not gonna lie. A purse would be hella convenient.” And Riverchimp pointed out some of the exciting things one could carry around in a purse: “Could you imagine how much drinks you could fit in a purse? Probably 8 cans. 8 friggin cans! With you all the time!”
4. Dance like no one’s watching. Sadly, rigid gender roles even follow guys to the dance floor. As Charbok wrote, “Sometimes, I love to dance like a girl. I’m a big fan of twerking. I also like to dance with my arms up, like in a girly way.”
5. Wear makeup. Although the politics of beauty culture are quite complicated, and no one should feel compelled to wear makeup all the time, it can be a really fun way to express oneself. Unfortunately, guys rarely have the option of wearing makeup without judgment. As RamsesThePigeon noted, “I’m a decent-looking guy, but a little eyeliner and some foundation could still work wonders for me.”
6. Get pampered by ladies. We agree with kbjami on this one, “I also love flowers, gifts,… and think girls should also buy guys stuff.
7. Wear yoga pants. Baseballwiz definitely said it best: “Wear yoga pants. I’ve worn them in private before. it feels like kittens hugging your legs.”
8. Have fun with one’s children without being judged. Chairforceveteran put it perfectly when he wrote:
When walking through a parking lot, holding my daughter’s hand, we usually skip. I get the dirty looks from men and women alike. I’m making my kid happy, why so much hate? Also, when my oldest was 4 ish, she asked me to wear a headband with kitty ears so we would match. We went to iHop and a dude would not stop staring at me.
9. Be able to show emotion without being labelled as weak or gay.” Whether it was crying over a sad movie or simply relating to a guy friend, an overwhelming amount of respondents felt they couldn’t be openly emotional or sensitive without some sort of backlash. “Sometimes if I’m upset I wish I could just cry and not feel bad about it,” Thee_Gonz admitted. If this isn’t proof that strict gender roles hurt men, we don’t know what is.
