You may have decided that you are far too young to be dating, this is just fine, you are doing well! But eventually you will, how then will you know if what you have is safe and healthy? Perhaps, you have a friend or relative who is already in the dating pool, how may you help them check the health and safety of their relationship?
These 7 tips arm you with that prized knowledge. Consider thus:
1. Date People You Know and Trust
While it’s not always practical to become friends before dating someone, try to get to know your date through a group activity before you go solo. You will see how your date-to-be gets along with others, and you will get some good clues about what to expect from them.
Try to talk on the phone before you begin to date. Getting to know your love interest before you become an item gives you more to talk about and less to feel awkward about when you spend time as a couple.
2. Be Extra Careful About Meeting People Online
If the person you would like to date is someone you met online, insist that when you meet them in person, you meet them in public or with a group of people. Also rather than go alone, why not bring a friend along with you? Ask lots of questions to be sure that the person you are meeting is who they claimed to be online.
Trust your instincts: If something doesn’t seem right about the person, do not share your contact information and leave the situation immediately.
3. Talk To Your Parents
Never go out without telling someone else. Even if it’s a little annoying, let your mom, dad or another adult know when you are going out. Be sure to tell at least one person who you are going with, where you plan to go, and what time you expect to return home.
It’s a good policy to bring your cell phone along if you have one, and to leave your date’s phone number with your others just in case anything goes wrong. Be prepared for the unexpected, and telling people about your itinerary is for your own good. Remember Cynthia and her Facebook friends?
4. Know Your Limits and Communicate Them
Review your personal values and hopes for the date before leaving the house. Be sure to let the person you are dating know what makes you comfortable, what makes you uncomfortable, and what kinds of things you would like to avoid on your date, whether it’s sex, alcohol or touching. Let your date know what kinds of things you would like to do, too! Plus, be sure you know and respect your date’s limits as well.
If you feel uncomfortable about a situation, say “no” clearly and confidently. You have the right to change your mind about something. If someone likes and respects you, they will back off. If your date doesn’t respect your decision, stay safe by leaving the situation.
5. Avoid Drugs and Alcohol
Drugs and alcohol compromise your ability to make smart decisions and to escape dangerous situations. They can make you take risks you wouldn’t usually take with your body, and your safety in general. They also prevent you from getting to know whom you are dating is really like, and keep your date from getting to know the real you.
If you feel you must have a drink when out-of-doors, keep an eye on your drink at all times: Many teens are sexually assaulted after someone slips a powerful sedative drug (sleeping tablet or liquid) into whatever they are drinking.
Resisting the urge to drink is the best way to prevent getting hurt, and having to deal with the consequences of unwanted sex.
Getting out of the house for dates is always a good goal. Not only is it safer to hang out in a public place such as a restaurant, cinema, or mall; it’s fun to discover new places with someone else. Going out rather than hanging out tells your date that you think they are special and want to explore the world —not just the cable channels, and something else (if you know what I mean)-– with them.
If you must spend time alone with someone, wait until you have known them very well and have set ground rules. Even if your date wants to make out (lingo for kissing), you don’t have to go along with it. Trust your gut, and don’t be afraid to say no and call it a day.
7. Know The Warning Signs of Dating Violence and Relationship Abuse
Dating violence is extremely common among teens. Even if your partner is charming and sweet at first, look out for signs of abusive relationships. You can get more information about this by following the link, Teen Dating Abuse: Are You a Victim or a Culprit?
If these warning signs sound like someone you are dating, take a step back and reevaluate the relationship. If you need help figuring out what to do, talk to a school guidance counsellor, teacher or parent.
