These were the words of Saidat when asked what she felt was the greatest barrier to her happiness.
I’ve always had low self-esteem. I don’t like my body, and I don’t like the way I look. I really want to lose weight (I’m about five-foot-six and weigh about 82kg) so that I’ll feel better about my body and be healthier. I want to be happy with myself, and I feel the only way I will is if I lose the weight. I feel that everyone looks at me and thinks I look disgusting, especially guys. I feel I’ll never get a guy if I look this way.
Think Saidat is right? Well, whatever your answer, there are many ways to be find happiness with yourself. And it does sound like she has put lot of pressure on herself to lose weight, as though losing weight will magically equal happiness. It won’t. But changing some of the other areas of one’s life will. What are these, and how may they be applied?
If you feel you want to become more healthy, then let’s start there. Sometimes being healthy means exercising more, eating a variety of nutritious foods, and making sure your spirit gets filled up too by doing things you love. Look to become healthy rather than to lose weight. Then the focus is on your overall health and not just a number on the scale.
If You Want More Muscle Tone, That’s Fine!
If you want to tone up your body or have more energy — great! Then begin making those choices that bring you closer to that goal (sleep more, walk more). When you can make taking care of your body a realistic goal, you will achieve it – even if your goal is to work out three times a week, and get seven hours of sleep a night. When you achieve this goal, you will feel good about yourself, and it will give you higher self-esteem, which will begin to shine through in the way you carry yourself, and smile at people. The satisfaction will ooze out of you! You will radiate it like the sun!!
Be Happy For Yourself
And guess who notices all these achievements? Guys! Now, if you want a guy to look at you for the RIGHT reasons, then focus on being happier inside — he’ll notice that over any weight loss any day. Don’t hinge your happiness on someone, or something outside of you. A dazzling personality can attract you the kind of guy you are looking for. But remember, it all starts with you. Nothing is a magic cure. If you don’t like the way you look, work on fixing your views of yourself first — then others will notice your improved confidence!
And that dear friends is an advice, nit only for Saidat, but for every girl who has such negative views of her body. And as I like to say: You are not your body, you are the total package! Believe that!!
