Trust is like a white sheet of paper – a drop of oil is all it takes to mar it. Yes, the oil stain may be made less and less obvious, but there will always be lingering smudges reminding you of the stain.
It does occur that the bond of trust in a relationship is broken, either due to suspicion and jealousy borne out of insecurity; or because one party was unfaithful to the other. What then may be done in these situations?
Consider the 7 tips that follow:
1. You should talk to them, they might just understand your trust issues, and prove to you that your thoughts are wrong, that they aren’t going anywhere and will never push you away or hurt you.
2. You might have good reason to have trust issues. Honestly, have them prove themselves. You may ask to see their phone, and if a big deal is made about showing it, chances are something is going on.
Most of the time when people make excuses and get on the defensive, they are hiding something. If this person lost your trust, he/she needs to earn it back, not just expect that your trust be served on a platter.
3. Don’t give up yet! But once you realise your problem, that is the first step in fixing it. Before you can get over your trust issues, you have to learn to trust yourself.
I am no psychologist, but I do know that trust issues are rooted in insecurity in oneself. Work on yourself before worrying about relationships with others, and when the time comes, you will be happier.
4. If there is a huge element of trust that has been broken, and there’s no saying how long, if ever, you will fully regain it. But if there is much love between you both, you will be able to get through it.
Unfortunately some people have this thing where they crave attention, so even if they have someone they are dating, and someone else seems to want them, they find it hard to say no or not flirt back.
They may think that it doesn’t cross the cheating line, justifying it in their head. If you are in that situation, it will be good to rethink whether you would want to be with someone like that. You only accept the kind of love you think you deserve. Do you deserve to be treated like that? No!
5. Maybe the reason you haven’t been able to open up to someone is because deep down, you know they are not the right one to open up to. Love is a risky thing, because when you love, you put yourself on the line.
Listen to yourself. Don’t second guess yourself. And when there’s someone worth opening up to, you won’t even have to think about it.
6. There is no way to keep yourself from worrying now that the bond of trust is broken, worrying is going to become a norm in your relationship. It’s easy when you two are together all the time, and living near each another – but once long distance enters, you will soon come to realise that it’s harder than you were prepared for.
Is there mutual trust between you two? Feelings needs to be laid out, otherwise, things may get even messier. Not trusting will make you crazy in a long distance relationship– and you deserve better.
7. It’s tough to make a relationship work after the bond of trust is broken. If you want to stick with someone who doesn’t tell you things happened, and you have to find out by going through his phone, or by other means. Please go ahead and do that.
But trust is a major thing in a relationship. If you don’t have it, you might as well say good bye because when it’s broken, it’s broken.