Teens, Your Secrets Are Out! We Now Know the Top 5 Things You Think About The Most


Dear Teens,

It is with heart-felt emotion that I reveal to you that your secrets are out. The cat has finally been let out of the bag. A little bird (not twitter!) sang into our ears, telling us the top 5 things that you think about. We know we cannot get into your heads – we are no magicians – but the one who can, told us that even when you are watching your favourite team win that important game, or when you are watching the Kardashian sisters, or your favourite soap on TeleMundo, that even then you are still thinking of these things:

1. The Opposite Sex

That you spend between 85 and 95% of your time thinking about the opposite sex. Your boyfriend or girlfriend, or perhaps the boy or girl you want to fill that position. True?

2. School

Not in a fun, oh-I-can’t-wait-for-school-to-resume-on-Monday way, but really how hard you think school is. That you really hate all that homework, and tests, and projects, and all those difficult stuff you just have to learn! And the added pressure that makes you feel like if you don’t, then you won’t amount to much in life. Which makes you want to scream “Just chill out already, puhleese!”

3. Your Parents

About how you want them to care more. That when you say “Oh, it’s okay Mom,you don’t need to come.” You want them to see how it is such a huge lie. Of course, you are scared, and it is not OK, and you want them to come! But heaven forbid you say that, and remain an eternal baby. You want them to use their discretion, and insist on being there for and with their ‘baby'(which you like and want to be called in the secret places of your heart)

4. Swear Words

That you love to use swear words, and have the mouth of a bus conductor when you are in the midst of your friends. You say all the F,B, G, D, and S words together with their many variants.

5. Fear of Having a Sex Talk With Your Parents

That you would rather die first, than have your parents  talk about the ABC of sex and dating with you, the first, and second, and third, and uncountable time! Not to have their mouths mentioning all those body parts that make shrink to half your size on the chair, and wonder if you parents are saying all these because they are suspicious of their ‘innocent or not-so-innocent’ baby.

So, was the little bird right on all counts? Hit us back with a rebuttal if not.

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